Last Legs

I'm feeling a little spookified at the moment.
Turns out I've been having an unintentional David Duchovny day.
Loads of Californication. Watching him be a heavy drinking, womanising, writer; it really gives me something to aspire to, you know?
I had a bunch of episodes stored up and as I had little else to do today, (more on that later probably), I decided to watch my way through them.
Then after tea, an episode of the X-Files comes on. This is what spooked me. It's this village full of people eating brains of people that don't fit in.
Now I'm left on my own in the house with a pair of dogs that shake like crazy (because they do) and they are keeping an eye on the door because obviously something between the living room and the edge of their hearing somewhere down the road is making some noises. It's this uncertainty that gives me the willies. When the dogs keep (and i mean keep because they were doing it a second ago) keep looking for something I can't see, I'm fairly sure that they are getting ready for the axe wielding, big mask wearing, brain eater to jump out.
Cleverly I have a plan. The coffee table has a glass top, or there's a bottle on the bookcase that's almost empty. Granted the bottle's still got a little of some pretty expensive stuff in and is quite light - I'm sure I'd get loads more power behind a 1m by 50cm sheet of glass, even if it would be harder to wield.
Still I'll see what instinct does to me, I could have the power of some kind of man-tiger in me just waiting to be called upon.

As anyone who has read more than one of these knows, my dissertation is due pretty soon. Good news is that I have indeed written more than the 7500 word minimum, but less than the 10,000 word maximum. So I've handed my crazy mutant baby over to my charming proof readers, who all of course have real lives and so are very kind to do this. The difficulty with the shape that I have at the moment is that it's not like every other project. I ain't researching anything. It's a making project. So, it would be alot easier to follow if I wrote it completely chronologically, but then again, maybe the issue is because I'm not quite smart enough to do anything the way I'm told. I'm not saying it's a bad 50-something pages, just that it reads a bit like one of those stories that they do from multiple perspectives. First off, Method-Doug tells you how to follow him. He's very much a backward looking guy, dwells on the past and the way things were. Results-Doug is a bit more useful, he can tell you what everyone else is saying, he knows his stuff (but as his stuff is creating this specific set of teaching materials, it's still not that useful). Finally you get Discussion-Doug. It's up to him to show off how smart he is, so he's quoting everyone, blaming other people, and in a brilliant move, pointing out how slight failure is actually better than a win as it really teaches you something useful.
But now it's getting proof read. As most people who have proof read to my face will know, I don't take this well. I got a list of notes from a friend who took his time to read it for me and the first few ones, I went though, "Nope, Wrong, You don't know as much as me about this topic, don't be daft." It was around this point I realised that if I'm getting people to proof read, deciding that I know best and ignoring anything they isn't going to help. Here I did manage to take some of what was being said in and make some improvements. Hooray! Tiny amount of personal growth!
And speaking of tiny, there really is a limit to the number of times you can hear "That's not long enough", or "Try making this a little longer", before you start questioning your masculinity.

So I was watching Strictly Come Dancing and John Barrowman is on singing Everything she does is magic, and it turns out he has an album out for Christmas! Yay!

I need to balance that one out with some overt heterosexuality. Smokey and the Bandit! Barbecued meat! Real Ale! Jessica Albas bottom!

Hooray! Balance is restored to the universe and I can stop writing.


Except to say that I just saw the word Horspitial, which I really hope is a real word for horse vets.