I got Pig Poisoning

So the reason i aint posted in ages (sorta ages), is that i have been busy working hard.
lectures, assignments, leggy blondes, feature articles and background reading (ok ones a lie but aint saying which)

now back in coventry, alex was the crowned king of procrastination, he would spend all day on an article and we'd go check on him in the evening and he'd of just about got dressed. annoying if we wanted to play games
now during those years i never really procrastinated, thats actually coz i didnt do any work and so had nothing to put off.
this year is my first serious procrastination oppertunity, and i think i managed pretty good.

we are havin an 80s themed costume party/night out on saturday its going to be like totally awesome and i swear there will be some rediculously embarrising pictures online on sunday/monday (before the girls ask me to destroy them)
i got my 80s guy costume sorted on tuesday but the story is one of epic procrastination and 3 for 2 pigs

tuesday i had much reading to do, i also had a costume to sort out, so after a morning of reading i took a break for lunch and walked to matalan for costume bits, they had 2 out of 3 and as i was walking back the possiblity of an excursion to cribbs (the HUGE mall on the outskirts of town) occured to me. naturally havin work i resisted, no cant go all the way there, no take to long, reading to do, cannot go on some damn fool quest for this last thing.
the problem was the use of the word quest. second i thought that i had no choise and the quest began!
having searched every shop in cribbs (almost) i found them and my costume was complete, but i was pretty hungry - it was 6pm by then
so after a quick cheeseburger, then search M&S for some percy pigs coz im there and ill need reading fuel if i ever get home.
so im prowling the store muttering "pigs" over and over under my breath like the numbers guy in lost.
"pigs... pigs... pigs...pigs!".
and i see they had big 400g bags! great!
i got 2! - last longer
it was a 3 for 2 offer!
i got 3!
this is now a bag full of 1.2kg of pigs
i then decided to eat half a bag on the bus home
so i was bouncing round the flat in my 80s gear most of the night, before an extreme come down which left me with a serious stomach ache and 2 bags of pigs to tempt me.
i now have my picture of sarah telling me off bluetacked over the bags, making me feel guilty as well as ill with every piggy bite.
i curse tempation in all its pink swishy goodness.
i still have some reading to do.
ttfn

Douglas is the internet

why am i back to work? bugger. i really was hoping for week free to work on some stuff for my writing science module but nooooooo, im working 9-5.
Still im saving up cash for the nintendo wii - oooOOoo zelda! ooOOoo nunchuks! its so me!
thing is that dispite the journalistic trials one might expect from in a job writing in a magizine, this job also includes certain tasks that really make me nothing but a very expencive, very very slow internet connection.
examples? fine
douglas is email
wednesday im spell checking and grammer checking a document then i get sent to run a cd with 4mb of files over to a studio nearby (mine is not to reason why, mine is but to do and die). but this took me half an hour - quick calculations during my boring patches today (thats 1030am to 5pm) gives me a speed of 2.2 kbit/s - i think without broadband a modem runs around 56kbit/s - i am very slow
douglas is Google
today i was told to find the names and adresses and phone numbers and all kinds of other stuff for companies all over europe (think a website completely in german, thank god my language skill aint too bad - coz i was searching for high definition pre or post production facilities) still i didn't do bad to semi quote Google :
Results 1-10 of about 35 "Europian HD facilities". (3.5 hours)

then again i may be getting the hang of being a new hound:
"mr blank isnt at his desk right now, would you like to leave a message?"
"tell him doug kitson called and that i need ad copy in my inbox before the end of the day - my editors really breaking my balls on this one"
good god, some times im fabulous :)

you want posts i'm just fighting to stay concious

i apologise for poor spelling (more that usual)
u see i've just finished a 3 day chunk of lectures and as usual after that comes the 1 night of heavy heavy drinkin to forget all of it.

this weeks 3 days were good tho, we had a circus and puppets and a trip to the science centre, tho i did feel my slight age disadvantage showing as i giggled at the pervy puppets when others scoffed, ooed and aaahed at the circus and ran round the science centre using my (fairly significant) size advantage to clear a path for myself thro the chitlins to the exhibits - there was a room that got smaller in the alice thro the looking glass bit that i loved even if i i did nearly face plant infront of a bunch o' families when i tripped on the way in and an infinite well that jim an i could see the bottom of. crantastic

then of course was the night out, or more acuratly, as we finished at 4, the afternoon/night out, that why i maybe fulfiling my promice to hayley by postin but frankly im straddling - like kieren and his singapore 'massuse' - the edge of concious, im on my way out so you must forgive that my photos will have to wait till the morning, ok, a more workable hour of the morning.

good night out tho even if some people were a little the worse for wear by the end of the afternoon - putting me in charge of your wellbeing may not be the best of plans (just for future reference)
i remember fun chunks, hugging kieren after he took us back to (bugger i dont remember the name) that place we went to last time with the holes in the walls, hugging him coz they played sweet child of mine - fookin love the 80's after that they played build me up buttercup (i did the official southam school dance routine and looked a pillock throught) and livin on a prayer, hell yeah.

also to facilitate memory i txted myself: 'a txt 4 me much drink and almost dancin best a luck rambo! c ya danni ice cube back aaa' im pretty sure this ment rambo was on tv and i missed it and i vividly remember an ice cube down the back from danni.

AND my camera makes my (frankly piss poor 'moustache') look more impressive yay!

to summerise a hilarious 3 days aimed at me the less mature science communicator, followed by some really fun chats with course mates that we may not remember tomorrow, followed by some extremely plutonic grinding of kieren and shirin.

photos to follow +1 moustache

I have finished my reading!

hurrah!

it may of ment staying up into the wee small hours last night but i finally finished the reading that i have been doing most of the christmas hols. yep Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix huzzar

also i managed to get through most of the mammoth set readings for tomorrows return to lectures whew - slog and a bit that was

seemed like everytime i was settlin down to a speck of honest reading something far more entertaining or important popped up, so in addition to reading i have : imported all the music off my ipod so my computer and ipod are in sync
beaten alex at the towers game he found on the internet (level 75 w00t u r teh suck!!!1)
eaten my weight in chocolate digestives
already mentioned harry potter
also my window over looks a bunch of other blocks and more specifically their kitchens - how am i, an adimttedly week willed male, supposed to concentrate when the girls across from my window insist on excercising in their kitchen, or cleaning the windows? its just the universe being far more difficult than it needs to and im glad they stopped.

also in exciting new years doug related news ive been growing my magnum pi mustache, i was also watching the mask of zorro so i currently have a tiny bit o' fluff on my chin to. very dashing keep an eye on facebook as there will eventually be a moustache progress photo album hooray! (is it that obvious im single?) :)

oo speaking of movies the inaugural simucast of the funk and wagnells channel took place on monday (chris and i watched dead or alive and msn messengered throughout with semi hilarious conciquences, for any more details find the funk and wagnells facebook group).
long story short DOA is the movie for the 12 year old boy in all of us - holly valance, jamie pressly and more heart stoppingly good looking girls kung fu fighting. plot? do u really need one? it has everything: ninjas, girls in bikinis, bright colours, vollyball, girls in their underwear, fake lesbians and a complete lack of respect for every branch of science (bloodless sword fights, no bruising, movement recording nanobots, undownloading and the most incredable disregard for the conservation of momentum you will ever see) it really was 73 minutes of hilarious, gorgeous gorgousness and i enjoyed every single one of them. :)

well todays wednesday so normally id be off to the kitchen for our flats wine night watching oz and james' wine adventure then torchwood, but they've both finished so we'll have to play board games and drink instead

ill keep you informed

Why I havent been posting...

ok so if im at uni ur forced to put up with semi-weekly 'doug updates' of varied levels of hilarity, those of you paying attention may of noticed a 3/4 week break in this, those of you with nothing better to do may actually of wandered why.
well home only has dial up so the connection is so slow it actually hurts (this is true, theres a very amusing story envolving a suction cup bruising a ring onto my forehead coz i had to wait for a download).
but im back an i have my mac back so all is good

and i have 'entertaining' christmas related stories, (read on if you dare...)

well there were hilarious chrsitmas presents, chris got me an insanity prawn boy tshirt that says anus! (thatll probly make more sence if you go to weebl stuff and watch on the moon ep 9). ive worn it in public a couple of times but missed out a perfect oppertunity to ruin polite conversation with it. alex an i were trying to help chris' little sis beth to straw-pedo a cup of squash and their mum asked how she'd breath with a straw up her nose, chris said eyes, alex said ears, i pulled open my jumper only to realise i was wearing my zelda t instead. damn

there was hilarious christmas dinner where one of my uncles conviced pete (my brother) to fill a party popper with cranberry sauce, we gave it to my cousin an told him to set it off at the grown ups table. pete, me and my uncle then spent half an hour on chairs cleaning cranberry sauce off the celing - if only he'd aimed at my grandad like i told him...

LRE work continued until last week (thank god they opened on jan 2 so i could get 3 whole days work in before i left) its tough but at least i can pester my co-workers to keep myself entertained, at theres plenty to read (being a library an all)

so im back at bristol,
its been raining,
an its bloody freezing,
my heater seems small and ineffective (any one draws similarities to my man parts will be in trouble)

but.. the second series on Quantum Leap was waiting here for me on DVD!
Theorizing one could time travel within his own lifetime, Dr Sam Beckett stepped into the Quantum Leap Accelerator... and vanished. He awoke to find himself trapped in the past, facing mirror images that were not his own, and driven by an unknown force to change history for the better. His only guide on this journey is Al, an observer from his own time, who appears in the form of a hologram that only Sam can see and hear. And so, Dr Beckett finds himself leaping from life to life, striving to put right what once went wrong, and hoping that each time his next leap would be the leap home.

god i love that programme